Captions 14

Taken from the ongoing captioning game from the messageboards,  All images are property of New Line, etc. etc.
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Pippin holds the flaming Palantir

Not even Peregrin Took, who had a reputation for
 eating anything, could handle a Mordor Atomic Fireball!
- Daughter of Kings


Hobbits never got the Gondorian Game of "Hot Potato" - Doctor Gamgee

 With his eyes shut to enjoy the aroma, Pippin failed to notice his pie had caught fire. - Primula

Pippin found the secret way Saruman stayed warm.  - Eruvanne

 Merry warned Pippin not to remove his pie from the oven with his bare hands. But did he listen? Nooooo. - Luthiena

 When Hobbit bowling goes horribly wrong:
I told them not to play with wooden balls and candlesticks... - Wanderer

 That was the last time Pippin ever tried to flambe a pie.  - Luthiena

 Hobbit rehab methods: 5 minutes holding flaming hot stone, you'll never touch another ale again!...or anything else for that matter. - Bregotamer

 When it came to a staring contest with Sauron, Pippin failed miserably.  - Luthiena

 There are some things a chappie's mind absolutely refuses to picture, and Sauron singing 'Rumpty-tiddley-umpty-ay' is one of them.
(with apologies to P.G. Wodehouse) - Primula
Legolas & Eomer at the Last Debate

Legolas discreetly checks to see if his new anti-perspirant is doing the job.
- Frodosmiss


Éomer: Quick! Quick! Someone take my picture next to this Legolas cut-out! - Laiquendi

Legolas wondered how awkward it would be if he asked Eomer to go to the square dance with him. - Luthiena

What do you mean the Army requires crew cuts?  - Doctor Gamgee

 Legolas: You see, Eomer, whenever I feel I'm having a bad hair day, I look in a mirror, wrap my arms around myself, give me a little squeeze and say "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and doggone it, people like me!" - Frodosmiss

Aragorn and Gandalf droning in background...
Eomer: Legolas, do you understand anything he's saying?
Legolas: Shhh. I'm trying to read his thoughts instead of hearing his words.  - Eruvanne

Here's the plan...you grab Aragorn's feet, I'll grab his head and we'll carry him to the sink, where we can wash and fix his hair. I'm definitely NOT going into battle with him looking like that! - Frodosmiss

Voice-over:
"Fangorn Organic Shampoo: I told two friends, and they told two friends, and so on, and so on, and so on!" - Doctor Gamgee

 Legolas: Simon says hug yourself!
Eomer: No fair!...I can't bend!  - Primula
Galadriel in her small swan boat

 Galadriel goes a little dinghy.
 - Primula

I shall remain Galadriel and go into the....oh, darn it, this isn't the way to the Grey Havens! - bregotamer

Galadrial grumbling to herself: I knew I shouldn't have dropped the oars in this swamp water! - Starflower

 Galadriel is very disappointed that no one came to her Pirates of the Caribbean 3 re-enactment party.... - Frodosmiss

So I burnt dinner while looking in the mirror. Is that a good reason for Celeborn to send me up a river without a paddle? - bregotamer

This D-Lux Swan Boat sure looked bigger in the picture on the box.  - Primula



Gimli and Eowyn at Helms Deep

No more blind dates!
- Lindorie
Gimli - I give unto you, Eowyn of Rohan, 3 strands of golden hair, given to me by Lady Galadriel.
Eowyn - Thank you, Gimli, I truly hope these are the same color so I can use them as plugs! - Gandalf the White

Gimli, it would never have worked between us.
Wait, wrong movie!  - Strange Elf

I'm sorry, Gimli...I just don't feel like having a thumb war... - Frodosmiss

Éowyn: Now, Gimli, just make sure that he doesn’t see you slip this love potion into his drink. Oh, and make extra sure that I’m the only female around … … I’d really hate to have gone to all this trouble for nothing. - Ashlyn

 Eowyn: Oh dear! I am so awfully sorry! Can you ever forgive me?
Gimli: There is nothing to forgive, dear lady. You would not be the first person to call me Grumpy...as long as you don't call me Dopey! - Frodosmiss

No, it cannot be true. Please, Gimli, tell me it is not so.
I'm very sorry, my lady but it is so. You have been voted off the Olympic sword-fighting team.  - Eruvanne

Gimli, Saruman is on his way! This is hardly the time to do "the Hustle!" - Doctor Gamgee

I'm sorry, my dear, but I prefer to swim with little hairy women. - bregotamer

 Eowyn: (skeptically) You mean...If I kiss you,... you will turn into a handsome prince?
Gimli: (left hand behind back with fingers crossed) Oh, absolutely! I'll be so tall and handsome, Legolas will cry. - Lindorie

 Gimli: We represent... the Lollipop Guild....the Lollipop Guild...the Lollipop Guild! And in the name of...the Lollipop Guild, we wish to welcome you to Munchkinland! - Frodosmiss
Gandalf, Boromir & Legolas see the Balrog coming

Boromir: This will never work, Legolas! Didn't you see "Weekend at Bernie's"?!?
- Doctor Gamgee
Gandalf, wake up, it's your turn to guess the Pictionary clue! - Icarus

Boromir: *Gasp!* "Why did Gandalf stop? Is it dangerous?"
Legolas: "I don't see anything..."
Gandalf: "Oh I hate it when my hair snorts up my nose."  - Primula

(Frodo, Pippin and Aragorn do the Macarena):
Legolas: "This is crazy?!"
Boromir: "You haven't seen the worst of it!"
Gandalf: "Get this youthy act of idiocy away from me!" - Gandalf the White

Gandalf (while clicking his heels):There's no place like home! There's no place like home... - Lindorie

*looking at the "Kick Me!" sign pinned to the back of Aragorn's tunic*
Boromir: "Gandalf . . ."
Legolas: *speechless confusion*
Gandalf: *... whatever was I thinking when I convinced Elrond to let Pippin come along!?!?! ..." - Ashlyn

Boromir : " What is that devilish noise ? "
Legolas: " FANGIRLS !!! "
Gandalf: " Quick ! Run for your lives. "  - Daisy Gold

Boromir... "Is that Britney Spears? What IS she wearing this time?" - Icarus

Three stages of response to finding out that Merry and Pippin just won Middle Earth Idol:
Shock (Boromir -- "I didn't see that right.... I COULDN'T have seen that right)
Incredulity (Legolas -- "Have the judges been smoking pipe weed?")
Reality Hits (Gandalf -- "They were insufferable before... just think of what they'll be NOW!") - onónë

Boromir: "Whoa! Babe alert."
Gandalf: "Oh no....not again...."
Legolas: "Arwen? What are you doing down here?"  - Primula

Please Eru, if you get me through this, I'll never smoke pipeweed again! - Lindorie



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