Primula's Sung to the Tune of...4


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Title:
Hobbit in the Hole
Run Run Run
Elves in the Valley
Help Elrond, ahh!
The Undead King
Itty Bitty Ring Thing
An Educated Comparison
Four More Ales
Elrond's Lament for Miruvor
Ent-Draught
The Lonely Gollum
You'll be Held Down by a Tree
The Storming of Isengard
To the Tune of:
Turkey in the Straw
Fun, Fun, Fun
Down in the Valley
Help Me Rhonda
The Pirate King
Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang
Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
Four Leaf Clover
Old Grey Mare
School Days
The Lonely Goatherd
People Will Say We're in Love
Seventy-Six Trombones


Hobbit in the Hole
(to the tune of Turkey in the Straw)

Oh there was a little hobbit and he had a little Ring;
He kept it on a chain 'cause he didn't have a string,
And he liked to fill his table, always eating like a King,
Disappearing when he wanted to, he didn't lack a thing.

Hobbit in the hole,
Hobbit in the hole,
Round and warm and cheerful,
Dry and comfortable;
With a pantry to fill every plate and bowl,
There is nothing quite so comfy as a
Hobbit in the hole.

Oh there was a little hobbit, and he wore some workin' pants,
As he puttered in the flowerbeds, tending all the plants.
He liked to hear the far-off tales 'bout Elven ele-gance,
But when it came to keeping fed, he didn't take a chance.

Oh there was a little hobbit and he had a cheerful smile.
For his friends he was a-willin' to go that extra mile,
With a happy voice a-singing, tellin' stories all the while,
He'd rather have a pint of ale than a treasure pile.

Oh there was a little hobbit, bit more sensible than most:
Loyalty and bravery were hallmarks he could boast,
But most of all he wanted to just sit and eat some toast -
Spread it thick with honey-butter, serve it with a roast!

Oh there was a little hobbit, in whose spirit was no lack,
Who grew up hearing stories about a-goin' there and back.
For the bearing of a nasty Ring he had a certain knack -
Still he took a lot of apples in his well-stuffed pack!


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Run Run Run

(to the tune of "Fun Fun Fun" by the Beach Boys)

Well he got some warnings dire
And he's travelin' through the breadth of the land now
Seems he's cloaked all about and not shining;
He looks like an old man now.
And with the orcs right behind him
Goes runnin' just as fast as he can now

He'll have to run run run
'Til the hobbit takes the One Ring away
(Run run run 'til the hobbit takes the One Ring away)

Sar-u-man can't stand him
'Cause he looks nice and rides a good race now
(You have a new face, now you have a new face)
He makes fast marching armies
Look like they're creeping at a slow snail's pace now
(You're ridin' a race, now you're ridin' a race)
All the bad guys try to catch him
But he leads them on a wild goose chase now
(Leave dust in their face now, leave dust in their face)

He'll have to run run run
'Til the hobbit takes the One Ring away
(Run run run 'til the hobbit takes the One Ring away)

Well you knew all along
Rohan's king was gettin' wise to you now
(He thought you had lied, now he thought you had lied)
But since you took his Shadowfax
You've been riding like the wind blowin' through now
(You really can ride, now you really can ride)

But he can come along with you
'Cause you gotta a lot of things to do now
(He's ready to ride now, he's ready to ride)

We'll have to run run run til that hobbit takes the One Ring away
(Run run run til that hobbit takes the One Ring away)
We'll have to run run run til that hobbit takes the One Ring away

(Run run run til that hobbit takes the One Ring away)
(repeat 6x with high pitched "oooos")

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Elves in the Valley
(to the tune of Down in the Valley) 

Elves in the valley, this valley so sweet
As you recover, hear Elrond greet.
Hear Elrond greet, dear, hear Elrond greet
As you recover, hear Elrond greet.

Hobbits love pipeweed, Hobbits love food,
Elrond in wisdom knows this is true.
Knows this is true, dear, knows this is true,
Elrond in wisdom knows this is true.

I have been traveling, this house looks good.
Answer my question, "Will there be food?"
"Will there be food?, dear, will there be food?"
Answer my question, "Will there be food?"

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Help Elrond, ahh!
(to the tune of Help Me Rhonda)
Well since they took me down
 I’ve been out, fadin’ in my head

Shiverin' late at night and in the mornin’ I just lay like dead.

My chances are thin as twine (thin as twine)
But I know it wouldn’t take much time
For you to help me Elrond,
Help me keep it out of my heart.


Chorus:
Help Elrond, ahh!
Help, help Elrond, ahh!
Help Elrond, ahh!
Help, help  Elrond, ahh!
Help Elrond, ahh!

Help, help Elrond, ahh!
Help Elrond, ahh!
Help, help Elrond, ahh!

Help Elrond, ahh!
Help, help Elrond, ahh!
Help Elrond, ahh!
Help, help Elrond, ahh!
Help Elrond, argh yargh!
Keep it out of my heart.


I'm a-gonna be a wraith,
Though I was guided by a Man -

But he let a Ringwraith come between us
and it ruined our plans.
 
Well, Elrond I saw the Eye (saw the Eye)
And I can give you lotsa reasons why
You gotta
 help me Elrond!
Help me keep it out of my heart.

 
(repeat chorus 2x)

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(to the tune of Gilbert & Sullivan's "Pirate King" song, from Pirates of Penzance)

WITCH-KING:

Oh, better far to sniff and fly
Under the red-black flag I fly,
Though I play a servitudinous part
For a One-Eyed head with a blackened heart.
Apart from the living world, we frown,
Where flooding made our horses drown,
But I'll be true to the song I sing,
A wraith am I, an Undead King.
    For I am an Undead King!
And it is, it is a hideous thing
To be an Undead King!
    For I am an Undead Kiiiiing!

WRAITHS:

    You are!
Hurrah for the Undead King!

WITCH-KING:

And it is, it is a hideous thing
To be an Undead King.

WRAITHS:

    It is!
Hurrah for the Undead King!
Hurrah for the Undead King!

WITCH-KING:

When I sally forth to seek my prey
I help myself in a royal way.
I shriek a few more times, it's true,
Than a well-bred monarch ought to do;
But if that king on his living throne,
Really wants to call his crown his own,
He must manage somehow to get through
The dirty work that ever I do,
    For I am an Undead King!
And it is, it is a hideous thing
To be an Undead King!
    For I am an Undead Kiiiiiiing!

WRAITHS:

    You are!
Hurrah for the Undead King!

WITCH-KING:

And it is, it is a hideous thing
To be an Undead King.

WRAITHS:

    It is!
Hurrah for the Undead King!
Hurrah for the
Undead King!

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Itty Bitty Ring Thing
(to the tune of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang)

Itty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Itty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Itty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing!

Oh! You!
Pretty little Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
We loathe you!
And this
Pretty bitty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Loathes us too!
High! Low!
Every where we go,
We're fleeing, hiding from his Eye.

Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
This fine, gold, precious lie.

You're uncategorical;
A flame-burning oracle,
A fantasmagorical deceit!
You're destruction's spectacular -
To use the vernacular,
"Nuke it!":
Destroy it,
Complete!

Oh! Itty,
You! bitty,
Pretty little Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
We loathe you!
And itty,
His bitty,
Pretty little Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Loathes us too!
High itty,
Low bitty,
Anywhere we go,
We hide it, keep it from his Eye.
Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
This fine, gold, precious lie!

Oh! You!
Pretty little Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing
We loathe you!
And to
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
What we'll do!

Near! Far!
Tho' a hand it mar, oh,
With a rending toss it'd fry.
Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
This fine, gold, precious lie!.

You're sleekness is greed-able,
Your runes are unreadable,
You'll warp everybody's mind today!
You'll glide on his finger tip,
With pride in your ownership,
To take over all you can sway!

Oh! itty,
You! bitty,
Pretty itty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
We loathe you!
And itty,
to bitty,
Pretty little Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
What we'll do!
Near itty,
Far bitty,
On a mountain far, oh
What a horrid time we'll try.
Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
This fine, gold, precious lie!

Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
This fine, gold, precious lie!
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Itty bitty Ring thing,
Fine, gold, precious,
Itty bitty trap.

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An Educated Comparison
(to the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star)

Ent-draught, ent-draught, miruvor
Empty mugs upon the floor,
Gone, Old Wineyards, gone the wine,
I would rate it merely "Fine."
Miruvor and Ent-draught too,
Nothing next to Gaffer's Brew!



Four More Ales
(to the tune of Four Leaf Clover)

I'm looking on through my last mug o' brew,
The last bit of foam for me -
One mug was stolen, the other was chugged,
The last mug I spilled half all over the rug,
So I'm looking on through my last mug o' brew,
And wishin' that I had four more!
For no one's a quaffer quite like the ol' Gaffer,
But I'll give a try for sure!

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Elrond's Lament for Miruvor
(to the tune of the Old Grey Mare)

The miruvor, it ain't what it's s'posed to be,
Ain't what it's s'posed to be, ain't what it's s'posed to be,
The miruvor it ain't what it's s'posed to be,
Ever since those hobbits stayed.
Ever since hobbits stayed and some adjustments made -
The miruvor it ain't what it's s'posed to be,
Ever since hobbits stayed.



Ent-Draught
(to the tune of School Days, School Days)

Ent-draught, ent-draught,
Woody and springy ent-draught,
Treebeard has taught us a nifty trick,
Swig down that root-beer it packs a kick!
Ent-draught's our choice to get a rise,
Taller we are and a larger hat-size,
We can see it fizzing in both our eyes
When we take a couple of swigs!

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The Lonely Gollum
(to the tune of 'The Lonely Goatherd' from Sound of Music)

Mid up a mount was a lonely Gollum
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Strong were the hands of the lonely Gollum
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Sam with a Fro' faint and floppy felt 'em
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Throttling feints by those hands, they felt 'em
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

O ho lay dee odl lee o, o ho lay dee odl ay
O ho lay dee odl lee o, lay dee odl lee o lay!

The Fro' on the road fought the nasty Gollum
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Sparks in his eyes, all so fierce and solomn,
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Sam took him on, took that nasty Gollum,
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
But down in the dust was the Gollum fallen,
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Sent on away, was the lonely Gollum
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Not far to stay came the followin' Gollum
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Soon the Fro-do felt the gloating Gollum
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Gave digit up for the whatchacallum,
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Odl lay ee (odl lay ee)
Odl lay hee hee (odl lay hee hee)
Odl lay ee ...
... yodeling ...

Happy as all, lay dee olay dee lee ah ...
Oh lay de hee lay de hee de ha
Too soon that fall in the bubblin' lava
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-ahh

Odl lay ee, old lay ee
Odl lay hee hee, odl lay ee
Odl lay odl lay, odl lay odl lee, odl lay odl lee
Odl lay odl lay odl lay

HOO!


You'll be Held Down by a Tree
(to the tune of People Will Say We're in Love from 'Oklahoma!')


Don't stand too close to me,
Don't come beneath my leaves,
Don't let your eyes close in sleep,
You'll be held down by a tree.

Don't turn aside to me,
Don't let your nap recline,
Your nap's held in sap this time,
You'll be held down by a tree.

Don't listen to me sing,
You'll give your freedom to leave,
And if you're suspecting me,
You'll be held down by a tree!

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The Storming of Isengard
(to the tune of Seventy-Six Trombones from 'The Music Man')


Seventy-six strong Ents led the big parade
With a hundred and ten huorns close at hand.
They were angered by lumps and bumps of uncounted different stumps,
Reclaimin' all the barren land.

Seventy-six strong Ents caught the wizard there,
With a hundred and ten huorns right behind,
There were more than a thousand orcs
Bobbin' round like corks,
Bent machines of ev'ry shape and kind.

They're returning now the Isen to its river bed,
Thundering, thundering all along the way,
Double high the water flies, the fires dead,
Each furnace having it's last big day!

There were fifty rooting Ent-toes in the outer wall,
Crumbling, crumbling quicker than before,
Gushing waves of ev'ry size,
And angry trees who'd improvise,
Determined to even out the score!

Seventy-six strong Ents led the big parade
With a hundred and ten huorns close at hand.
They were angered by lumps and bumps of uncounted different stumps,
Reclaimin' all the barren land.


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