Seeing as it was going rather slowly, Legolas wandered off to do a little shopping. The others watched with trepedition as Gimli stepped up to the Elves. He handed over his ticket as if daring them to question it.
"Frawd Yknits?" grinned the Elves.
"You have a problem with that?" Gimli glowered at them and fingered his axe. One of the guards reached for it but he twitched it out of their hands. "You'll not be touching this. I'll set it aside, but I want to be clear that it is MY axe."
One of the guards turned and picked up a small bell, giving it a silvery ring. Another Elf in airport uniform quickly paced towards them. "This one is being uncooperative," they told him.
"I am NOT," huffed Gimli.
"Come this way, Mr. Yknits. I'll make sure you get where you need to go," the new guard said. Gimli hesitated.
"Go on!" Gandalf called from where he was waiting in line behind them. The Dwarf gave a grunt and followed the guard to a separate security station at the side.
Sam stepped up next.
"Eegmag Esiwmas - finally, a proper sounding name!" the guard said. "Sometimes I don't even know how I can be expected to pronounce these other ones."
"I expect you'll be wanting this," Sam said, politely handing over his short sword. "I think that's it."
"What about that pan?"
"Well, it's a… a frying pan. For cooking," Sam said, wondering if they were addled.
"It's a potential weapon."
Sam gave a weak laugh. "Only to chickens and rabbits, or maybe a fish now and then."
They just held out their hands. Sam handed his precious pan over to them with a sigh.
"Let's take a look in that pack…" He watched in growing dismay as they rooted out every last piece of his precious cookware set, even the ladle. One of them held up a small box. "What's this?"
"Salt," Sam said.
The Elf opened it and cautiously sniffed at it then dropped it in the bin.
"What?! What did you go and do that for?" Sam demanded.
"All white powdered substances have to be confiscated."
"What color do you expect salt to be?" he asked in amazement.
"Go on through."
Sam glumly joined the others. "Sure going to be short commons once we get there. What do they think we can do, just eat things raw?"
"Bleah," agreed Pippin sympathetically. "Want some cheese?"