Inkling Challenge: Middle Earth Wrestling

by Kaybaggins

Middle Earth Wrestling: Shelob v. The Oliphaunt

The crowd is getting restless awaiting the last two matches.

Gandalf: Ahem. The second to the last match is upon us and we have cleared enough space for the Oliphaunt to make its way down to a special wrestling arena that will accommodate its very large size. Here comes the Oliphaunt now as he stomps into his corner and scuttling behind him the eight-legged wonder, her royal wickedness, Shelob the Spider.

Boos and hisses from the hobbits, men and elf crowds. Cheers from the orcs, wargs and other nasties.

Saruman: Now this should be a good match. Personally, my bet is on the Oliphaunt. Sorry Shelob darling, but one good smash and you will be nothing more than an eight-legged matchbook.

Gandalf: Saruman! You are a judge and you are not allowed to place or make bets. Now, where is our referee?

Kaybaggins: (Running up the aisle). Here I am. Ready to go. If you don’t mind, I think I’ll stay a bit away from the contestants on this match and make my counts from a distance.

Gandalf: Good idea. You could get smashed by the Oliphaunt and Shelob has a tendency to poison people when you’re not looking.

Kaybaggins: Okay. Let’s get this match underway.

The Oliphaunt quickly lifts its trunk and blows Shelob across the ring. Shelob is now curled up into an eight-legged ball as The Oliphaunt stomps towards her aiming to finish her off in one quick smash. Shelob regains her momentum and flings out a web across the path of the Oliphaunt, which causes him to trip. Shelob fortunately gets out of his way. Shelob scurries around the Oliphaunt and uses her web to rapidly wrap his feet in a layer of strong silk. The Oliphaunt is bellowing in frustration and desperately trying to free himself from Shelob’s spider web. Shelob goes in for the finishing blow and poison’s the Oliphaunt with her deadly poisonous sting.

Saruman: Wonderful. A death match. We haven’t had enough of these.

Gandalf: Don’t you every get enough?

Kaybaggins: Alright you two. From the Judges’ bench I will call this match in Shelob’s favor, 1, 2, 3. Hats off to Samwisegirl for these great matches and see you for the final match between Theoden vs. Denethor.