Gimli - a poetic biography - Wheathills
A Tiny Ode for a Humble Kitchen Implement - Auntkimby
Wraith Drinking Song - Morgoth
Bilbo Baggins - Vison
- Mr. Underhill
Shelob - Shelob
The Queen of Spiders
orc poem - Lindorie
Inspecting - Tori*Took
For Shadowfax - Auntkimby
Orcs - Auntkimby
Orc-host Parade - Doctor Gamgee
Denethor, Denethor - Eilenach
For all mearas - halavana
Frodo - Sauron's Rite-hand-man
I am losing myself - (unknown)
A Tribute to Dominic Monaghan - Legolas74
Une Poem de Gollum, j'aime - Elethril
A poem for our Aragorn - Suzie Sheelf & Magic
Ring - Elvenstar
Gimli - a poetic biography
When Gimli was a baby
His Daddy swelled with pride,
But adults fled at just one glimpse
And other babies cried.
If Mommy took him to the park
All around would stop and stare,
Yet baby Gimli would smile at them
Through his mass of facial hair.
When little Gimli went to school
All the children turned their backs,
So he would tip-toe up behind
And scare them with his axe.
But once they got to know him
They loved his style and grace,
So it didn't seem to matter
That they couldn't see his face.
By the time he went to college
Gimli was the coolest dwarf in town
And he was thrilled that on his Prom night
He was given the Prom Kings crown.
His yearbook entry made him laugh
Though he couldn't work out why
He was voted 'Most likely to succeed
In slaying Uruk-Hai'
So Gimli grew into a dwarf
With stature strong and fine
Then off went he to Rivendell
To become one of The Nine
The rest we know, we've read the book
It's written down for us to see.
We've grown to love this hairy dwarf
And the warrior he came to be.
(So, the moral of the story is
If you think that someone's weird,
Look really hard and you will find
A friend behind the beard).
A Tiny Ode for a Humble Kitchen Implement
I am a fry pan, dented and battered
To you I'm not much, but to Sam I mattered
He lost me in Mordor and how he mourned
I'm a very important character- I'll not be scorned!
So now I make an earnest plea-
For next "minor character"- how about me?
Who says the character must be living?
I am the fry pan- I did much giving!
Wraith Drinking Song
Loud is the sound of the flying worm . . .
Oh Lord Sauron how do I make it turn . . .
No hobbits here, no Ring is there . . .
Don't venture back with pockets bare . . .
Spent all day over marshes dead . . .
Where have the the two halflings fled? . . .
Wanting now drink from elves that bled . . .
But how to drink without a head?
Is a thief!
Lovely precious gone!
Burglar, that's all he is,
Old hobbit Burglar, that's all.
Friend of Elves,
Rich in Wisdom;
Our world is saved by his
Deeds. His life is gone,
Our lives are safe.
She lies in wait....
Her hunger patient...
Eyes piercing the darkness......
Legs poised to move quickly....
Orcs are her standard fare.......
But now something sweeter approaches her lair....
- Mr. Underhill
The Queen of Spiders
She was the daughter of Ungoliant
Her lair dark, silken webs across the door
Evil deceit was her hateful way
Long years she brooded and was bored
Only the very foolish came near this giant
Biting and stinging her unwary prey
Orcs of course
are foul creatures,
their horrid teeth
are their best features.
Their skin is tough,
they smell real foul,
they spit when they talk,
and howl when they prowl.
They have strange names
like Grisnack and Uglûk,
and we wantsss to hates them
but we love their pluck.
We laugh when they cry
we cry when they snicker
but without them all
the plot would be...thinner.
(what? you expected something else LOL?)
I can't let a challenge go by,
I must somehow give it a try.
I'm not much of a poet
and most everyone knows it
"Here's my offering," I say with a sigh.
There once was a silly old orc
Slapped his head and said, "I'm such a dork!"
Though I'm not fond of chicken
one food makes my heart quicken
the other white meat, elf, not pork!
Wanted to get at least one poem in for my
favorite orc ;-)
they have to be just right
getting Uruks ready to fight
warriors have to be tough
pierced nose there
making sure orc skin is rough
about this orc...
who exactly is he?
yet looking funny
But the coolest orc of them all!
White coat shining
Hoofs pound the earth as
the swift one takes flight
We hate orcs.
Pelt them with corks.
Stick them with forks.
We so hate orcs.
Laughter that serenades
wickedness! Iron shod
March of the Grave feeders!
Orc-draught from Orc-slaughter
Power the Hobbbit pair.
Lost in their Dark dispair.
Uruk-Hai, Slave Breeders!
- Doctor Gamgee
Looked in a Palantir,
Met there with Sauron, and
Saw only doom.
Madness has captured the
House of Anarion.
Flames leaping high, Gandalf
Closes the tomb.
For all mearas
The thrill of flight without leaving the ground,
like a horse set free, eyes on open field,
digs in his heels and runs.
Frodo the hobbit,
brave is thee,
move very sly,
swiftly among the trees
The ring-bearer are you,
going against Sauron,
Using your wits,
to out-smart that moron!
The cracks of doom,
alone stand keen,
throw in the ring,
and you'll be set free!
I am losing myself
to the darknes
*your hand touches mine*
Together, we are going into horror and fear.
You know Death waits for us on this Road,
but you will not leave me.
Sometines I wish you were not here
Then I could lay down and die.
But we are together
So I squeeze your hand and
we go on.
A Tribute to Dominic Monaghan
To many of us
you seemed to have appeared
from out of no where.
On that big screen
in the Fellowship of the Ring
you brought our Merry to life.
But as time moved on
I learned of the road
that you took to get
to where you are now.
After Sixth Form College
you got your first break
As a teenaged shop-lifter
turned private eye named Geoffrey
in Hetty Wainthropp Investigates.
Then there was Sasha.
Young, innocent Russian submarine sailor
who watched helplessly as a friend
sacrificed his life to save the rest of the crew
in Hostile Waters.
poor, misunderstood Etienne.
To quote Legolas:
"For me the grief is still too near"
The emotions you brought to that role
in Monsignor Renard
always bring this she-elf to tears.
That brings us to This is Personal
with you as Jimmy Furey.
I wish I could tell the tale,
but, alas, I'm not from the UK
and still have yet to find it
here in the US.
And now, as the cliché goes,
All that hard work has paid off.
You've gotten your big break
and are one of the stars
in our beloved LOTR.
May your acting career road
Go ever on and on
Une Poem de Gollum, j'aime
(a warped variation on a not very well known poem by an author
whose name eludes me, [muffled cackle])
Gollum is my very best friend
He is always nice to me.
Many times we sit and hiss
Or jump about in senseless glee.
He might be a bit slow to get my jokes
And slippery when we hug
But Gollum's my very best friend
A poem for our Aragorn
Infant child so young and fair,
what does your future hold.
Dunedaian, Mortal, Isildur's heir,
Kept safe within the elven fold.
Estel the Elves called you,
Thorongil had the wanderer's feet.
"Chieftan" the rangers hail you,
In Lothlorien, you did Arwen meet.
Ranger "Strider" Wizard's friend,
Sitting in an inn at Bree.
Waiting for Gandalf's lonely errand,
Waiting patiently on a Hobbit plus three.
To the Hobbit you did swear your sword,
To save Middle-earth you'd give your life.
An heir of kings, an exiled Lord,
Your fondest dream, Arwen as your wife.
- Suzie Sheelf & Magic Dreamer