Miscellaneous Lothlorien Bits

Lorien (an acrostic) - Silivren Ithildin
Gargling Galadriel & Crestfallen Celeborn - Primula
Sandalf's Gong of Dworien (a Spoonerism) - Primula
The Lembas-eaters & Mallorns- Primula
O Lothlorien, Elven Wood - Rosie Cotton
Mallorn (an acrostic) - Silivren Ithildin
The Lady and the Servant - Agape4Rivendell
There was a Hobbit... - Agape4Rivendell
Elf Humor - Primula


Lorien-An acrostic poem

L ovely songs wind through the trees,
O rdinary woods these aren't.
T owering Mallorn trees grow
H iding the beauty within.
L acy lights shine throughout.
O ver the forest floor
R ace fleet Elvish feet
I ntent on things of beauty.
E lven Kingdom on Middle-Earth.
N owhere else can compare.

- Silivren Ithildin

Alliterations for Lothlorien Day

“Gah!” gargled Galadriel, greeting graciously whilst galloping gorgeously in gossamer gown. “Get going! Gag-worthy ghouls and goblins grievously gather.  Gad not! Goof not! Gallivant great goers, gather grub, gather gear - go to grey gosling gunboats, goodbye!”

“Crud!” cried Celeborn crankily. “Chimerical conjuror cut class, can’t cross-examine him, can’t collect clues! Caught caseload of choleric, combustible, conflagrant colossus, causing categorical career change to crispy critter, correct?”

“Carrion.” confirmed Chiefton, crestfallen. “Couldn’t cross chasm, crumbly construction crudely cracked. Crashed, croaked.”

“Confounded creepy creature,” carped Celeborn. “Can’t cope.”

“Come, come, Consort” comforted comely cohabitant companion. “I conjecture a classy comeback. ”

- Primula

Sandalf's Gong of Dwórien
 A Spoonerism

In Limordene, in Dwórien
Weldom have socked the meet of fen,
Mew fortal eyes have lean the sight
That eyes there lever, brong and light.
Lagadriel! Lagadriel!
Weer is the clawter of wore yell;
Stite is the wahr in your hite wande;
Unstarred, unwained is leaf and land
In Limordene, in Dwórien
Fore mare than moughts of Thortal Men.

Little lodgers languished, lapped-up leaves of lembas; latent longings for lard led to large, lurid loops of lingual lunching, lousy with luxurious leavening. Lorien’s leaseholding leaf-leapers loaded lots, but lodgers left little.

“Leapin’ lizards!” laughed the lithely lumbering legion of lightly laced Legolas-lookalikes, later. “Lembas loads look like leftovers! Look, Lady!”

Lady laughed. “La! Looks like little lodgers legitimately love Lorien lembas!”

Marvelous, moving mallorns! Mallorns, might and main of many mobs of meticulous marksmen (most mainly maiming Moria’s monsters), make most manageable motels.  Marksmen macrame mesh mattresses mid masking mass, monitoring monsters and making monster-mincemeat.  My, my!  Massive mallorns also make mansions, multiplex mezzanine meeting-places meant for mumming, mooching, moseying or making music. Many musical melodies mount miraculously from moving musical mechanisms, made melodious by multitalented muses.  Mallorns mambo (misliking military marches) in moonlight, mannerly, magnetizing and magnificent. Mmm.
- Primula

Oh Lothlorien, Elven-wood
To be here feels so very good
After we’ve been through a blizzard
And lost the dear old wizard
In the gloomy Moria Mines -
We’ve really had some bad bad times.
Now among a golden tree
We laugh again with mirth and glee.
- Rosie Cotton

Mallorn-An acrostic poem

M agnificent trees of Lothlorien,
A wes all who see them.
L ovingly towers over Lothlorien.
L acy are the lights within.
O ver us all they provide shelter.
R ich golden leaves in winter
N ever get old to look upon.
- Silivren Ithildin

SAM - Just wanted a little description of him before I began...
Staunch, Steadfast, Simple, Solemn
Allegiance, Affection, Adventurous (not), As good as gold
Meritorious, Muddler, Mighty (in heart), Minstrel (even surprised Frodo!)

The Lady and the Servant

She came upon him unawares, smiling at the sight. His face turned a raging red. She waited for his bidding. He picked himself up from the ground. She walked forward. He stepped back. She swiped his back and arms. He held his breath. She whispered his name. He nearly fainted. She walked him back. He sighed.

“What’s this on the back of your neck?” Frodo wondered. He pulled a yellow star-shaped flower from behind one of Sam’s ears.

“Elanor,” Sam whispered, “or so she called it.”

“What were you doing – rolling in it?”

Sam’s face turned red and he ran.


"What are you laughing at, Haldir?" Boromir questioned him.

"The song my friends are singing."

"What is it? I am not familiar with the tune?"

At that moment, Celeborn stepped from the flet onto the stairs, giving a withering look that immediately quelled the singing.

….except for one voice, off in the distance, some poor Elf who had not seen the look! Haldir translated.

“There was a Hobbit had a dog and Frodo was his name-o…

F R O DO F R O DO F R O DO ooooh…”

Haldir and Boromir both burst into laughter.

- Agape4Rivendell

Where did the Elven dentist live?

At the mouth of the Anduin...

"Orophin," complained Haldir, "Every time you go running right along those narrow upper branches like that I just get terrified."

"Then do what I do," said Orophin. "Close your eyes!"

"Celeborn," said Galadriel with a graceful swirl. "Do you think this new dress does me justice?"

Celeborn eyed it critically. "You don't want justice - you want mercy!"

So....this Elf walks into a flet... ow.....

Celeborn: "Do you always have this much trouble making decisions?"

Galadriel: "Yes and no."

What do the Galadrhim use to get to the top of their mallorns?

An Elvelator

What to the Orcs around Lorien fear the most?

Elf-inflicted wounds.

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