Orc Nursery Rhymes

(to little Bo Peep)

Old evil Sauron has lost his Ring,
and doesn’t know where to find it.
leave it alone,
and Ring will come home,
hiding a Hobbit behind it.

Where oh where has my halfling gone?
Oh where oh where can he be?
With his shoulder cut on
and his ring on tight
Oh where oh where can he be?

There was an old wizard
he lived in a zoo..
he had so many goblins
he didn't know what to do

He raised them
and made them a
viscious lot he
set them loose and
now he's got naught.....

Three blind orcs
three blind orcs
see how they run
see how they run

You better watch out
for banished King
he'll cut off your head
with Nar-sil

You've never seen
a uglier sight
than those darned orcs...

Lurtz be nimble
Lurtz be quick
Lurtz duck under
the daggers tip...

What a nightmare! To tuck in a child singing:
Rock-a-bye elfling, in the tree tops, when the wind blows, the mallorn will rock,
when the bow breaks, the orcies will feast, the tree feeds the fire and the elfling,
the beast. :-(

Lurtz to kill went up the hill
to fetch himself the Ringbearer
Lurtz fell down when he lost his "crown"
and wondered just who was the slayer...


three orcs in a tub
and who do you think they be?

The butcher, the baker,
the urak-hai maker
turn them out, knaves, all

To the tune of I Am a Teapot

I am an Orc so big and mean
I am the worstest thing you've ever seen
When I get angry hear me roar
You'd better dive and hit the floor!

(with the exception of Pilbara, who I am certain is a very beautiful Orc)

LITTLE ORC (not to be confused w/Little Elf)

This little orc went to market
This little orc stayed home
This little orc had roast elf
This little orc had none
This little orc cried "elf, elf, elf" all the way home!

Griznack Sprat
could eat no fat
Ukluk could eat no lean
so i guess between themselves
they could pick a hobbit clean
** ducks and runs for cover from all the hobbit loving folk **

pilbara orc
Ugluk had a little Warg, It's coat like melted snow....
And everywhere the Ranger went
The Warg was sure to go.

Lurtz the uruk ...went up the hillock ....to fetch a pair of halflings,
he fought a ranger, was in mortal danger and it ended with a sword swing.

a little sad orc, sat with his fork, eating a hapless elf, Miss Shelob showed up, wanting her grub ... all to her royal self....LOL
Shelob: LOL - she does not like to share precious, no, she does'nt - nt

Anborn1: LOL!!! Oh that IS bad, but in the cutest way!! Do Orcs have mothers? Do they love them? nt :-)
Shelob: But, of course, all the little orcses must have 'moms' who love their little toesies? - nt

So they are ugly
And maybe they smell a bit
They're mummy loves 'em

little elf
A little elf response
This little elf went to the ME board
This little elf stayed at the Pony
This little elf laughed at Shelob
This little elf ate macaroni
This little elf cried "more more more (nursery rhymes)" all the way home!

Row, row, row your (elf)boats
gently down the Anduin...
Closer to the waiting orcs
Who seek the Errand's ruin!

pilbara orc
Hickory,Treebeard and Dock
Some Ents the Isen unblock
The walls fall down
And some orcs will drown
While Wizard looks on in his shock.