Hamster Tales: Legolas the Hamster in a Muumuu

Legolas the hamster in a muumuu
Image by Redbeard

Legolas, Hamster of Mirkwood, entered into the lore of the Fanclub by way of the Prancing Pony. One night a person looking for others who shared common interests innocently asked:
 "Does anyone here like Legolas and hamsters? But not together."

 It took but a moment for this tiny denizen of Middle Earth to be created. He was originally in hamster-sized Legolas garb, knocking down orcs with his hamster ball, but as a member of the Pony, he was given a tiny muumuu to wear in honor of the pretty brown muumuu Legolas wears at the Council of Elrond.  As you can see here, it is quite flattering on him.  

Hamster Legolas loves to burrow
Into the cedar shavings,
He plows a sweetly-scented furrow,
His pink little paws a-waving.
Legolas likes his squeaky, quick wheel,
And he's fond of his small plastic dome,
But he loves the cedar shavings best -
For the woods were always his home.
- Primula

There once was a hamster so good,
An archer to best Robin Hood.
His wheel was a sight,
Squeaking high-pitched all night
And his teeth simply whipped through that wood.

There once was a pet suave and dashing,
Through fellowship foes he came crashing -
With smooth, perfect fur,
His wee feet a-blur
With hamster-ball he rolled, orc-smashing.

Lego-hamster in muumuu did dance,
Among green woods twirled and pranced,
But his dress gave a flip
When on bow he did trip -
And he wished he had worn his pants!
- Primula

Orli, our hampster so dear
Could take on an evil blue smear,
With his squeky wheel of doom
The smurfs flee the room,
And peace now rules the land!
- Cheshire Cat

Who is that hamster in a muumuu?
That hamster cannot be my elf...
Who is that hamster in a muumuu?
Please tell me that is not my elf!
- Miss Froo

Hamster, hamster where art thou?
Underneath the muu-muu now
Rolling, tumbling in the ball,
O Hamster, hamster you've got them all!

The orcs they scatter left and right
Running from the plastic ball in fright,
Your little pellets twixt their toes,
How you vanquish all your foes!

Hamster, hamster where art thou?
Underneath the muu-muu now.
- Primula

1:00 A.M Musings

There once was an elf-boy named Lego
Who always cried, "Lego my eggo!"
But then on one day
A wizard did say
"Go follow the son of Drogo."

But Lego said No
He cared not to go
He said, "I'm an elf, as you know"

The wizard said "Ho!
I should turn you to dough!"
But insted, he turned Lego to Moe!
For Moe, as you see
Is really furry
And has a darling burrow.

And Lego, now Moe
Cried "Oh, dear me! No!"
And now he was willing to go.

The wizard said, "No!
It is too late to go,
For you have abandoned Frodo.
He left with the boys
They took all your toys
For you were not willing to go."

Poor Lego was sad
Cause he had been bad
And quietly called for his dad.

He begged on his knees
And all heard his pleas.
Wait... Do hamster have knees?

Finally, after Lego said, "please!"
The wizard gave Lego his leave.

Then Lego was happy
And was getting all sappy
So Gandalf said, "Go call your pappy!"

But Lego said, "Halt!
I feel like a malt!"
So they sad down at Rivendell's 'Walts'

He soon was aware
That Lego did wear
Something that all do fear.

I dare not say
So near to the bay
What it is called by they.

In the commone tongue
And in tales that were sung
It was called the Muumuu of Wung.

This Muumuu gives aim
Therefore causing great pain
To the orcs that Lego uses as game.

Gandalf decided to use
This muumuu of ruse
He said "Well, what can I lose?"

He turned to lego
And said "Now you may go.
But you must guard this son of Drogo."

And Lego said, "Ho!
I surely will go
And guard your little Frodo."

As he reached the gate
Gandals said "Wait!
For you are still Moe, mate!"

When Gandalf said "Twah!"
The girls all cried "Ah!"
And all of the boys yelled "Bah!

For what they did see
Was Lego pretty
And all of the she's
Attacked he.

He turned them away
And said, "I must save the day
Then I will return to the Bay."

This is the tale
Of one Lego the male
And of all the events that befell.

- Miss Froo

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