Taken from the ongoing captioning game from the messageboards,
All images are property of New Line, etc. etc.
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Off Screen Announcer: When you sign
up for Middle-earth Mobile...
You get a whole network of support that follows you everywhere....!
White bearded guy behind Theoden:
people go! - Eärrámë
*sounds of moving cattle*
Now, when PJ shows up, everyone shout "Surprise"
and Gandalf will light
the candles on the cake! Quick, here he comes! Everyone look solemn . .
. - Doctor Gamgee
Aragorn: Why is everyone so serious?
Gandalf: Step back, fool of a Ranger, I was here first!
Aragorn: Sheesh, it's just a Wii, it isn't as if Middle-earth's future
depended on it.
(awkward silence as everyone turns and stares at him)
Aragorn: Erm, never mind. - MerryK
The Brothers (nephews, cousins, uncles,
grandfathers, etc...) Grimm!!!
Well, thought Aragron, this is what I
get for waiting till half-time to use the bathroom! - onónë
Gandalf: Man! The lines are so ungodly long at
Krispy Kreme! - Frodosmiss
[Female Voice] I love the funny way you stand out from the crowd.
Gandalf: What in the world is she talking about?
Aragorn: Don't look at me. You're the one wearing white and sticking
out like a sore thumb. -
And now at Bill's Used Horse Sale, our blow-out
clearance has just begun, and as you can see folks, the customer are
just pouring in...! Don't be
left out, these ponies won't last long! - Primula
Erroneous newspaper caption....The Army of the Dead - Lindorie
thinking: Why does the entire court always have to follow the
King? I'm just heading for the outhouse... - Primula
For three days, all we've 'ad to eat is maggoty bread! - Lindorie
- Doctor Gamgee
Deagol to Smeagol: WOW! You got a whistle in your Cracker Jacks! All I
got was this stupid ring... -
Wha'd'you think I am? A Hobbit!?! - Wanderer
I know I said I needed fish bait, but do you always have to
bring the worms to me in your mouth? I mean, eww! - Primula
Mel Brooks is going to direct
"The Hobbit?!?" - Doctor Gamgee
"No, I did NOT take the last piece of
chocolate cake!" - The1Ring
Deagol: Has your grandmother taught you nothin'? It's not polite to
watch someone over their shoulder. -
"What are you talking about? A Ring? I haven't seen any Rings
around here! You must be imagining things, Smeagol my friend!" - Ashlyn
Hey! Quit pushing! There's plenty
of shoes on sale for all of us! - Traevynn
Deagol: Be vewy, vewy quiet...I'm
hunting wabbits! - Frodosmiss
Deagol: Now what?
Smeagol: Uh... I kill you?
Deagol: Let's look in the book.
Deagol: Shhh....I see penguins... - Wanderer
A mouse in the
Chorus: Hanibal comes!
Chorus Director: No, No, NO! Wrong movie. - Eruvanne
Oliphant 1: Did you hear that dear?
Oliphant 2: Yes I did, what do you think it was?
Oliphant 1: I don't know, but it sounded awfully like a bag of chips
being crunched up.
The Haradrim answer Dr. G's call for
help in taming the wild tarantula...
The United Peanut-Roasters of Minas
prove once again that their customers will beat down their doors for
that fresh, improved flavor!
(Now available by the ton, no
delivery available to the South. Ask about our elephantine discounts.)
When Cookie rings the dinner bell, all
the ranch hands come a'runnin'. -
Oliphaunt #1 to Oliphaunt #2: Don'tcha
hate it when you get a soldier stuck between your toes? Especially the
ones from Gondor- those pointy helms dig in something FIERCE! - Frodosmiss
Random person: AHHH!! MY EYE!!!! 0_*
Last Oliphaunt in the pool is a poufy
pachaderm! - Lindorie
"Aaaaand they're off!.
Oliphaunt Bob is pulling into the lead, with Ollie-Fant just behind...
Who will win the Golden Peanut this time? - Starflower
Oliphaunt no. 1: *sniff* Where's our armour? These arrows are going
to itch something awful tonight. - eowynmaiar
Oliphaunt 1: Ha ha, I can open my mouth
bigger than you... - The1Ring
*country pop music playing---* "Doin' the boot-scootin' boogie......" - Traevynn
Elves pushed the boulder off the edge of
the cliff above,
the Ringwraiths were thankful they had
bought a gross
of Acme umbrellas from that Wile E. Coyote fellow....
...In spite of
the years, the Wraiths never completely forgot their dear old nanny,
Mrs. Poppins.... - Primula
"Good grief - isn't it enough that we all have to dress the same - did
he also have to insist we had matching brolleys??" - Sylvania
The Nazgul Dance Academy, directed by the
Lord Sauron, is pleased to present their rendition of that Broadway
classic, "Singing in the Rain." -
"Wait! I thought we were supposed to have
our water-wings of Doom to cross the Ford."
"Well, yes, but umbrellas were cheaper." - Bergil
Sauron decided to gradually change the
color of doom to blue and swords to doom-colored weather deflectors. - gustaf
"We better watch out - that little kid named Dorothy might melt us
too!" - Starflower
**voiceover** Elven Palm Pilots with GPS* explained why
Galadrim were rulers of the Woodland Realm.
*Galadrim Positioning Systems
- Doctor Gamgee
Live long and...
what was it again? Drat. How does that irritating Vulcan do it,
anyway? - onónë
Why do I always get that wart
on my middle finger?
"I'm telling you Frodo! It's so dark in
Mordor you can't see your hand THIS FAR from your face!"- Icarus
Whoa! Look at what I can do with my hand!
That dear little hobbit was right! This IS the best weed in the
South Farthing! - bregotamer
Keep the Ring, Frodo, I broke a nail ... - Doctor Gamgee
Talk to the hand, Celeborn says...soooo,
I talk to the hand and it says nothing back- and this helps me how?- Frodosmiss
To Frodo: "You think that was cool? Wait
show you how to separate the thumb and first two fingers from the last
two...." - bregotamer
Whoa...like, my fingers...they're like,
all different lengths. - Bergil
I wish I had someone other than myself
other elves to practice my palm reading on. Everyone has a long life
line and will meet and marry a handsome/beautiful member of the
opposite sex- BIG surprise! -