Taken from the ongoing captioning game from the messageboards,
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Now where did I put that
can of Raid??
Treebeard to Merry and Pippin: "I swear to you, the
fish was THIS BIG." - BelladonnaTook
Treebeard: PJ, look at! LOOK at me! I told you we shouldn't let Tim
Burton do the animation! - Elven
"I don't care how good you think your
pipe-weed is. This is a no-smoking establishment." - gentle-giant
Honey, I shrunk the kids! - Traevynn
As a matter of fact I DON"T think it's
funny to put glow sticks in Quickbeam's soup. - Frodosmiss
muttering: I give up! I spend all that time on a useless spell which
blows up in my face, trying to make Merry and Pippen less bothersome
and all it does is SHRINK them! -
No, thank you young hobbits, but I would not care
for a bowl of hasty pudding! -
"I love you this much little brown
Treebeard. "Well your hair ain't that brown and short anymore old
man!!!" said little brown hare. "And by the way I'm not your little
brown hare anymore. I'm teenage punk-rock blue hare!" he said. - Samsmissy
Aragorn: 3000 years and not ONE new
joke . . .
"Grey Wanderer? Grey Babbler!! 'yawn'" - Anna Estel
"How do I tell Gandalf that he suffers
from chronic halitosis?" - Frodosmiss
Gandalf: Yes Aragorn, we have to take the Dwarf. Don't worry, he'll
sober up soon. - Strange Elf
You would think they could at least
leave the horses outside for that, wouldn't you? - Primula
Gandalf: Looks like the dwarf's about to blow big time! I hope Legolas
knows a good dry cleaner! -
I don't mind that Merry and Pippin are dancing on the tables, but do
they have to do the Macarena?
disregarding the others' ingnorance in the matter, Frodo continued
"I pledge allegiance to the flag
The Rohirrim may be our friends, but I'm never eating Eowyn's stew
again!! - Anna Estel
No matter how long the journey, the
hobbits never got used to seeing Gimli in a thong. - Traevynn
Sam whispers to the group: "I wonder if
Gandalf realizes that, when the sun hits it just right, we can see
his Harry Potter undies through his white robe?" - Frodosmiss
Great Wizard's breath! THAT turns into
Legolas???? With just one cup of coffee?? - Lindorie
"All right, let's try it again from the
measure. Where's our baritone? Merry! Get up here, and for the last
time, you may not sing lead!"
The hobbits were amazed to discover the entire world was made of dirt.
*Elrond to self* I knew I shouldn't have missed that last
You would think I'd be the first to get a
helmet. - Strange Elf
Elrond (to steal a line): "Right, where are we going?" - Anna Estel
(sings) One of these elves is not like the others...one of these elves
just doesn't belong.... - Frodosmiss
It's the Dark Land of the Dark Lord, who thinks to bring sunscreen?!? -
Elrond suddenly realizes that today is NOT Casual Friday... - Frodosmiss
Nah. No helmet today. Don't want to muss the 'do. - Traevynn
need a facial
and a manicure. - Lindorie
vu!" - Primula
Now how did that go? "Back and sides go
bare, go bare - In front wear armor here and there..." - Treblemaker
"There are how many Dwarf women?"
- Gandalf the White
Gimli learned his lesson about peeing on
Sauron's electric fence... -
"Umph. Excuse me! Too much ale!" -
"Great Caesar's Ghost!" - onónë
Gimli, wandering through the paths of the
dead, stumbles upon a dead man's party.
Ghost bouncer says, "Everybody's welcome, leave your body at the door."
Gimli learned a hard lesson about the
dangers of shuffling his feet on the shag carpet in the Golden Hall.... - frodosmiss
OOOO... Now THAT's Longbottom Leaf! - Icarus
"Oooh, scary hand! Yeah, yeah... Show me a whole body and
go 'boo' you Ghost-school dropout." -
Gimli, ever the gentledwarf, went to kiss the ladies hand. - Strange Elf
"I ain't going anywhere near them trees"
shuddered the mine-dwelling dwarf! -
a billboard in the South Farthing....
The flavor of Longbottom Leaf will reach out and GRAB YOU!!! - Doctor Gamgee
Gimli, watching the Ghost of Balin's Hand frantically waving
about, really wished he taken that Dwarvish Sign Language class. - Primula
For my birthday, I wish to NEVER have
anything to do with the Army of the Dead again! - Icarus